I think I mentioned in earlier post how hard it is to find comfort at times. Not knowing the outcome of this is hard, even receiving the results from the first set of scans was hard. I believe in miracles and I know that God could make this cancer go away in an instant but for now He's chosen not to perform an instant miracle and sometimes as a christian that's hard to take. At least for me it is. I got saved at 23 and for the first time my faith is really being tested.
I've been transitioning so much lately, I said before that the pain of having such a sick child doesn't go away but Sam and I have learned how to cope. The night of the results we stayed up late talking and I had to ask Sam what if Nathan doesn't make it, unfortunately it's a topic that's come up a few times since January. I've had people tell me to keep believing he's going to be healed. Truthfully that doesn't make me feel any better because it's not up to me or the doctors anyway. I don't want to put a lot of hope into a situation. Let me clarify, I'm not giving up, and I want Nathan healed more than anyone, but it's a situation that can go either way.
So back to Pastor MacDonald's question, do I believe God is good even in this trial? Actually when I think and ponder it, I do. I really do. And the reason I won't put a lot of hope on the situation is because it's not guaranteed, so I choose to put my hope in Christ alone. I know that He's good. I know that He's in control. When I look at the situation sometimes it truly seems hopeless. When I look at how much Nathan has changed sometimes it feels hopeless. But when I look at who God is and what He's done in the past I have hope again. And that hope is that no matter what happens in the end, God is good and everything is going to work out for His good.
Pastor MacDonald gave several verses but one stuck out to me
I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the Lord.
Psalm 27:13-14
I will see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the Lord.
Psalm 27:13-14
You see I love the Lord. I can't express that enough to whoever reads this. I have a hope that is hard to describe at times. I hurt a lot and at times I get really angry at God, especially for allowing this to happen but I can never deny the fact that I trust Him or deny that I take comfort knowing He's commanding this ship. I don't know how God is going to use this situation in our lives or other peoples lives, but I do know that He's forever good and forever in control and that our hope will remain in him.
Dear Lord,
Thank you so much, I just want to thank you so very much. I don't know much but I know you're real. I'm so thankful to be your child. I'm just thankful to know you, to be able to call you Lord. And I don't know what you're doing in this situation, but I know your glory will be shown no matter what.
Lord give Nathan strength. Lord keep him from being afraid. Lord I want you to heal him, I want him to grow old and testify on how you brought him out, but more importantly I'm now praying for your will to be done and for Sam and I to trust you even if it's against what we want.
Lord I pray that someone comes to know you in this situation. If you're using this to ultimately lead people to you, then so be it. I pray that despite everything going on that someone who doesn't know you come to know you.
Storms are going to come whether they're saved or not, but Oh Lord I can testify what it's like to know you in the midst of the storm. Lord I can say how I wouldn't be able to cope if it wasn't for you in my life. Lord I can say you give hope where there isn't any hope. You provide joy where there isn't any joy. You carry us when we don't feel like walking. You're there to listen when everyone else is asleep.
Lord you're real. I pray that people come to know you as their Lord and Savior. I pray that your light shines through this difficult situation. If only one person comes to you through this then it'll be worth it.
Lord let your light shine and your will be done and give us wisdom allowing us to accept it. Even though we don't always agree with it, let us accept it and when we feel down or angry remind us that you're here and you care. We may not see it now but we will one day.
We have hope in you and one day we will see you face to face and if all of this isn't made clear to us while on earth it will be made clear to us then.
Thank you for the time we all have with each other. Lord so many people are looking at Nathan's situation and we're all praying and hoping that he lives but truthfully the next five minutes isn't promised to ANYONE. We're no more guaranteed tomorrow then a sick child like Nathan. Please Father if you use this situation in any way, let it be to draw people closer to you.
In Jesus Name
Amen
Dear Lord,
Thank you so much, I just want to thank you so very much. I don't know much but I know you're real. I'm so thankful to be your child. I'm just thankful to know you, to be able to call you Lord. And I don't know what you're doing in this situation, but I know your glory will be shown no matter what.
Lord give Nathan strength. Lord keep him from being afraid. Lord I want you to heal him, I want him to grow old and testify on how you brought him out, but more importantly I'm now praying for your will to be done and for Sam and I to trust you even if it's against what we want.
Lord I pray that someone comes to know you in this situation. If you're using this to ultimately lead people to you, then so be it. I pray that despite everything going on that someone who doesn't know you come to know you.
Storms are going to come whether they're saved or not, but Oh Lord I can testify what it's like to know you in the midst of the storm. Lord I can say how I wouldn't be able to cope if it wasn't for you in my life. Lord I can say you give hope where there isn't any hope. You provide joy where there isn't any joy. You carry us when we don't feel like walking. You're there to listen when everyone else is asleep.
Lord you're real. I pray that people come to know you as their Lord and Savior. I pray that your light shines through this difficult situation. If only one person comes to you through this then it'll be worth it.
Lord let your light shine and your will be done and give us wisdom allowing us to accept it. Even though we don't always agree with it, let us accept it and when we feel down or angry remind us that you're here and you care. We may not see it now but we will one day.
We have hope in you and one day we will see you face to face and if all of this isn't made clear to us while on earth it will be made clear to us then.
Thank you for the time we all have with each other. Lord so many people are looking at Nathan's situation and we're all praying and hoping that he lives but truthfully the next five minutes isn't promised to ANYONE. We're no more guaranteed tomorrow then a sick child like Nathan. Please Father if you use this situation in any way, let it be to draw people closer to you.
In Jesus Name
Amen
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