My Blessing

Through all of this you've been my blessing

There's a song called "If I could"

that talks about what a mother would do for her child "if only she could"

and that song speaks volumes when it comes to you and your sister.

I would take this from you if I could but God didn't leave that up to me.

I never knew I could love this much

and I never knew I could learn so much from a three year old.

Through this journey you've taught me what it really means to be strong.

In your three years you've put up with more than I've dealt with in my thirty-one.

I've learned how to take things as they come and roll with the punches from you.

I've learned how to laugh through pain,

I've learned how to keep going even when I don't feel like it.

And I've learned this all from watching you.

I've learned what it means to get back up after being knocked down.

So many people have tried to teach these lessons yet I've learned it best by watching you.

I admire you so much.

And I'm so proud of the little boy that you are.

You are the sweetest, brightest boy I know.

God gave me a son that is so perfect for me.

It saddens me to know that I don't think I would've been as strong as you if placed in the same situation.

I don't think I would have handled such an illness with the grace that you've shown.

Watching you have blessed me.

You refuse to be down and even now you've beaten all odds.

Your father and I just heard another man talk who had radiation aimed at his head and throat as you did and he described it as feeling like "fire."

He said he could not eat or drink anything no matter what it was.

The doctors showed me your X-Rays and your throat was full of blood,

yet you were still standing and though it pained you to do so you chose to eat even when it hurt.

You went from having a huge lump, to having an eye that literally would not move and a face that was half paralyzed.

You went through radiation that burned the entire left side of your face

and though I noticed when people gawked at the sight,

it didn't seem to phase you

Your throat was so swollen the doctors didn't think you'd be able to finish your radiation...yet you did it.

You were able to walk when the doctors said your pain was so great you needed morphine. You've been though more than any child should have to go through and yet you're still standing...still standing.

You amaze me, you really do.

I'm so very very thankful to have you for a son.

You're my blessing.